Not our beer guy??

It seems yet again, a true Canadian hero has let us down. Back then it was Ben Johnson, now in current times it's Robert Norman Smith. Better known for his Alexander Keiths crazy Scottish 'Don't dis the proper beer drinking tradition guy' !
Ben was a saint compared to what hereos do these days. This is a shocker!!
Here it is .....

Big Let Down

Luna The Lost Whale Has Died

Guess they should have moved the whale that was bumping boats and just way way too curious Sooner, instead of arguing over it.
Stupid politics!!

Luna Has Been Killed!!

Seems Our Dollar Keeps Rising!

That's right..It really is going up.
So are my wages! I'm sorry tourism is getting hurt because Americans dont come to spend their money.....BUT.....
Tourism has MILLIONS, I don't!
Way to go A La Canada Dollar!!!!

Isn't this nice?

Congrats Canada for finally legalizing the VCR....Hip Hip Hurray! Hip Hip Hurray.
And to our closest neighbors. America, thank you for not Nuking Saskatewan!

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Jazagods Tiny StarShip

Oh Canada!!

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Canada is a cold and desolite place! I should know, I have lived here all my life, Well mostly!

Above the equator, when you flush a toilet, the water goes counter clockwise. South of that its clockwise. Apparently, there are some Americans that believe that Canada is so way far north, that the water in a toilet just goes strait down!

Well I read about the counter clockwise, and clockwise thing, and yes, Canadian toilets ARE like airplanes, and motorhomes toilets.....Strait down baby!!!

Gawd it's cold!!

Only true stuff about Canada here!

Oh Man!
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July. Anytime....If we are lucky!

You can email me with more Canada stuff, or just add it to my guest book.

It seems that Canada is in one of it's warmest Ice Ages yet!
Last week my girlfriend adopted a few twigs off a shrub consumed in mud....Not snow.
I kinda laughed at her because I didn't at all think putting them in water in a window would work.
Well since we (most of us) have no power in Canada; and seeing as though we only have water nowa days to trade, I decided to go trapping. I know, I know, leg hold traps are evil, but I don't have razor sharp teeth! In fact since we have no Dentists in Canada, I have no teeth at all.
Any ways I was able to catch myself an arctic rabbit, and I sold the fur as soon as possible so I could get some imported soil...Well ours is frozen...Um Was, totally not twig material anyways....
If only I had the technolegy(and spelling skills) as they do just 5 or 6 Km south! Then maybie...Maybie I would own an oven, instead of a firepit. Then I could feed my Wolves and Huskies cooked food instead of their normal diet, Seal blubber, and the odd whale fin for a treat.
The twiggs did bloom and they are amazing!
My main sorce of food,The polarbear, and arctic rabbit have moved more north. So north infact, they now live in antartica! I would show you a map but I had it chizzled it in my igloo, wich also melted!
Now I have to learn how to build with trees, wich is kinda hard because they only exist 6km south of here and I can't get there because the fresh water ocean has melted too!
Whats a car??? And who drew that silly line that made me a Canadian...
Well at least I will have Rabbit stew tonight

Much, much, much, more to come.....lol!

Great Canadian Inventions, Eh!

Did you know that some Canadians know how to invent stuff? Although its rare it happens to be true!

Some of these inventions include:

>Dental Mirrors (hard to believe someone had to invent it)

>Five Pin Bowling (ok)

>Green Plastic Garbage Bags (Mental note..I must take out the garbage soon.)

>Goalie Mask (obviously!)

>Jolly Jumpers!! (Possibly the most important thing!)

>Muskol ( Could'a used some of that last summer in Ontario)

>Paint Roller

>Retractable Beer Carton Handle (works for me!)

>Snowblower (Medical breakthrough with this one)

>Snowmobile (Main Canadian source of transportation!)

>Stanley Cup (Go Vancouver!!)

>Telephone (A ladies best friend)

>And the last on this page......Machine Gun Tracer Bullet. (Very handy)

Of course there are way more, but these list off Canadian essentials we take for granted every day. There is one more worth mentioning and thats Pizza Telephone computer delivery services. Now we all take that for granted!

Jazagod.

The below links are to Newspapers all across Canada. Of course there are many more, but these are all Papers I used to read on a daily basis(well at least the CrossWords and Comics sections) since I have lived in each locale.

Some Canadian NewsPapers

Although my StarShip is off the ground, it still has a long venture ahead!

Feedback, submissions, ideas? Email jazagod@yahoo.com